Monday, August 2, 2010

August 2, 2004 my sweet Emily made her appearance into the world. Today she is 6 years old. Such a special birthday for her and I'm so proud of her. Yet I can't stop thinking that in just 30 days, it will Megans birthday. We don't get to celebrate her second birthday, not like we should.

Today I have to be happy and not let the tears flow. We are going to make a cake any cake she picks out with any frosting she picks out. When dad gets home we will open presents and either go play at charlie safaris or go to a movie. Its not completely decided yet.

Right now at this moment is the only time I'm allowing myself to cry because I will never experience this age with Megan. I still question why and how a person goes on after facing something like this. It isn't fair. I don't understand. I just want to be happy again without all this pain in my heart. I want to smile and not feel so fake.

Today Is Emily's birthday and she deserves to have a fabulous day. Happy Birthday my princess number one. May lots of hugs and smiles and joy shape your day.